Noah's Ark

Noah's Ark-S1E1

Noah's Ark-S1E1

Noah's Ark-S1E2

Noah's Ark-S1E2

STUPID! I was very disappointed in this version of Noah's Ark. First of all it was unbiblical and what is Lot and Sodom and Gomorrah doing in Noah's time? Noah was before. Their was no reverence no respect to God at all it was more of a mockery. And another thing they were supposed to stay in the Ark for forty days and forty nights which they did not and Noah's sons were suppose to be married before they went on the Ark. I suggest you skip this one. Hallmark Entertainments has made some really good movies though like The "Odyssey" "Merlin" and "Gulivers Travels" check those out!

I thought the movie was pretty good despite the fact that Sodom and Gommora happened after the flood instead of Before the flood. I thought though that Noah looked more like Willie Nelson if anything. It was in some instances too long though unfortunatly, I would have been happy with just the flood than with the destruction of Sodom.

I know that many others have already complained about the Biblical inaccuracies in this movie, but I might as well add my two cents worth, too. :) As the title of this review says, "Noah's Ark" is a great movie, but a pathetic retelling of Biblical history. Altho very dramatic and heavy (and quite entertaining), it completely shreds any amount of accuracy. For example... 1) Lot was a descendant of Noah's, not his best friend. They lived hundreds of years apart and never even saw each other. 2) It was Abraham who bargained with God to find 10 righteous people in Sodom and Gomorrah, not Noah. 3) The movie also slaps the divine nature of the Bible in the face. The Bible clearly says that "All scripture is inspired by God", meaning that God wrote the Bible through mortal men. However, if you listen to Noah's wife Naamah, "You can't trust scribbling scribes. They change things. When they're done with the story, it will be as if you weren't even there." (loose quote) So first, we're supposed to believe that Noah and family witnessed the destruction of Sodom, and second, we're supposed to believe the Bible lies about it? 4) Shem, Ham, and Japheth took their WIVES on the Ark, not their GIRLFRIENDS. 5) Noah, his wife, his sons, and their wives, were the only survivors of the Flood. There were no peddlers or pirates. 6) God shut the door to the Ark, not Noah's sons. 7) There was only one window on the Ark, and the odds of them actually being able to move about on deck are slim to none. 8) I read nowhere that it says God assisted with the building of the Ark. 9) I also don't find anything about them going crazy or Noah's sons rebelling. 10) And can someone please show me book, chapter, and verse where God "had to decide" whether or not to drown the Ark? 11) Oh, yes, and God does NOT make mistakes. What is the purpose of having and omniscient being if he's going to make mistakes? This movie has God apologizing to Noah, but in actuality, God did what had to be done and what he KNEW had to be done. 12) And finally, God did not promise Noah that he would never destroy the Earth again, he promised he would never destroy the Earth by WATER again. It says later on in the Bible that when Christ returns to escort us to the Judgement Day, the world will be consumed with fire. So yes, the Earth WILL be destroyed a second time, just not in the same method. There are many smaller discrepancies, but these are the major ones. I fully understand that some things would have to be "amended" for a film version of the Ark, such as giving first names to Noah's wife and his daughters-in-law, but this movie far exceeds any legitimate speculation. Like I said in the beginning, this is a good movie for someone who just wants to be entertained, but if you're looking for a vast store of Bible knowledge, look somewhere else.

When seeing this TV movie, one wonders if the writers even bothered to read the original story in the Bible. About the only thing the real story and this movie have in common is the name of the main character, Noah, and the fact that there was a flood and he built a big boat. Past that, the writers ignored all sorts of historical facts. Like the fact that Lot and the whole Sodom and Gomorrah story happened about 1000 years after the flood. Like one of the women was to be sacrificed in the temple of a religion that didn't exist at the time. Like the fact that Noah and those on board the Ark were the ONLY survivors. There were no pirates or travelling salesmen. Even aside from the historical inaccuracies, I was offended by the extremely poor dialogue and plotlines. NBC has been advertising this for months as a serious, epic drama. It was more like an attempt at being a Monty Python ripoff. And it was a very bad attempt at that. I am highly offended that NBC chose to waste broadcasting time on this lousy excuse for a movie.

Funniest film I've seen in a long time (albeit unintentionally so). Loved the pirates chasing the ark - I expected eye-patches, peg-legs, parrots calling "Pieces of eight, pieces of eight", &c. Perhaps they were using an old Monty Python script. Bad guys don't wear black hats in this film; instead they have rotten teeth. I read an article by an extra (Jonathan Biggins) in "The Sydney Morning Herald" in which he said the cheetah (or some other "wild" cat) earned more on the shoot than he did. This says something for the production values of this film. Yea and verily, my brothers and sisters, behold a Grade-One Turkey. Question is - is it SO bad that it will earn cult status?

Dramatic ? Yes......Historically accurate ? Not Quite !.... This movie twists the Bibles details of the deluge by placing Lot meeting Noah during the building of the Ark. Fascinating time travel for Lot made in part by NBC !....being Lot had not been born until 2136 BCE, 234 years AFTER the floodwater's (2370BCE)....Thats like having George Bush meet with William Shakepeare ! And whats with this guy floating around selling items & nicknack's to Noah ? You can make a movie based on historical facts dramatic, but don't twist it around placing people where they weren't....especially when it comes to Gods Word.